Different faces of me

Sunday, October 30, 2005

at last, got myself a baju for jalan raya with him.. happy? definitely not. all the way at Geylang, we have been silent. he with the "ku smack baru tau" kind of face and me? afraid of asking anything, kept myself quiet all the way.

1st destination is Anglia @ Joo Chiat. he wanted so much i wear a white tudung with a black top and white pants. as we are riding, i feel wearing pants is better. and Anglia have the next to the best thing. and on top of it, it has 40% discount. upon arriving there, he said his mum wants us to wear maroon. so i have to crack my head again thinking of what to wear.

while walking, he kept on sneezing. so i asked, "are you sick?" his answer? "ye la, org tgh sakit rabak ni". if he's sick why in the 1st place go out with me and show me that kind of face? his reason? coz i keep on bugging him to go geylang. excuse me! i dun keep on bugging, you promised me to go today!! he said "tak tau org penat kerja, kene hujan selalu" i dun ask you to work like hell. i even ask you to take things slowly moreover you're just a part time rider. but your working hours you chose is similar to one working full time. my fault? huh?

so i said, dah la kita balik pun cantik.. he have to say something also.. "nanti kalau tak beli baju merajuk la tak pakai sesama apa la.."
ever since he's working part time i feel like there's no need for us to wear the same. this year many things have happened between me and him so i dun mind wearing different from him. if with family i can wear differently, moreover with you.. and he made this "smack kang" face again..

fine, so i dragged him to TKC to Nora Apparel. bought MYSELF a long black & maroon dress and paid for it. mine found. he said that i cerewet cari baju. in a blink i have found it already. look who's talking ah..

now for him, he have difficulties in choosing baju. my fault? i have asked him to buy lama dulu.. tangguh2 lagi kan sampai skrg tak ada baju.. ya lor, my fault hor.
he made decision to wear baju yg lama. what the? if you want to wear something yg lama, why make me buy a new one!!!! mug cow, bingit seh..

sealed with a kiss
1:45 PM

Saturday, October 29, 2005

last jumpa dia hari tuesday.. ni dah hari sat, fuh! lama jugak tu tak jumpa kan.. tak jumpa satu hal, berbual kat telefon pun tidak. haiz... apa kene eh? kerja bole, berbual dgn aku tak leh ka? gasak la..

balik jalan dgn mama, azwany & easmael dari parkway parade. nak cari kasut raya, tapi tak ada yg cantik la.. coz, dah biasa sgt pakai kasut cantik time hari2 biasa, sampai waktu nye, tak tau nak pilih mana. yg cantik sume mahal.. ye la kan, gaji pun nak kene jaga skrg ni.. so, decided to just wear kasut biasa aje, bersih kan sikit2. bole la..

waktu nak balik, tgh tunggu teksi, sekali ternampak a familiar face. the face that my mum & me tercari2 selama ini.. muka yg dahulunye terlampau rapat dgn aku.. siapa? kak didie la.. dia buat tak layan aje, walau pun aku sebagai kawan yg baik approach, beri salam & salam dia, dia tetap dgn pendirian dia tak nak ada kene mengene dgn aku.. ntah apa silapnye pun, aku tak tau..

cuma yg aku tau, last year waktu konsert solo Ruffedge, situ la mula2 nye dia dah cold towards aku. atas sbb AzanAddin of Ruffedge contact aku dan bukan dia.. salah ke? and utk pengetahuan diri nye, hari tu, aku dan hamza dah couple so aku tak ada feel terhadap Azan tu walaupun dia bermanja2 dgn aku.. hmm.. ntah la.. maybe she have her own reasons ya..

hmm.. now menunggu dia ni.. besok kak alia ajak kelua.. dgn kak dee.. seronok kan kalau kita2 kelua sesama.. nak bilang dia ni tapi mcm mana..

sealed with a kiss
3:28 PM

Friday, October 28, 2005

it's raining heavily right now outside. oh how my dear now? is he doing any delivery now? he's settled everything yet he still wants to work. dunno for what reason..

i pity the riders from pizza hut,canadian,mcdonalds, or anywhere la.. they still have to make delivery through heat and rain. whoever makes an order now, the person sure have no compassion for the people out there. you all take care k.

was out there with mama and azwany to geylang. bought myself 2 tudung. black & white. get my bedroom a set of flower. iza? letak bunga dlm bilik? kental sia. bought something for my bedroom.

my bedroom dah mcm bilik pengantin, as my window I uses blind, terasa jugak nak ada langsir. haha! so, i drilled drapery rod so i can letak some sort of langsir here. hehe.. susah nak describe kat sini. kalau dah jadi betul2, i upload gambar la eh.

hmm.. bilik berselerak.. takut ni. duit makin berkurangan.. tolong!!!

to PM, i've changed your name to my Star Linkies. hehe..

sealed with a kiss
2:10 PM

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

baru aje balik dari jalan.. jalan? haha.. tak la.. hari ni, hamza tak kerja malam, so aku ingat bleh la jalan gi cari baju kan.. tup2, lepas terawih, dia dah malas.. aku pun no hal la kan. coz i have adopted the "dah malas la" attitude.

so, the 4 of us, yg selalu gi terawih sesama tu, spent the night at Mak's Place. ingat nak minum ayak aje, tapi siap makan sekali seh.. ada banana split sekali. makan besak, tapi harga berpatutan. yummy!

geram dgn hamza tau. mana tak geram, org nak cari baju raya, dia tangguh2. siap, abang janji saturday nanti kita cari baju k. tau2 aku dengar, diorg berbual saturday nanti nak gi masuk jb lagi anu motor. ha, gasak la.

sunday nanti ada makan free la.. bro ayub nak belanja kat masai.. best!! haha!!

i found something bad about me, i have migraine. yikes! terrible you know. now, i cannot eat sesuka hati lagi.. nanti kene "serang". harap2 dia cepat2 la pergi..

hmm..... dah buat kira2 duit, lepas besok, bole makan daun aje la...

sealed with a kiss
2:30 PM

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

wah piang eh.. wa beh tahan leh today.. 1st biasa ah.. pasal duit.. ada ke patut, gaji ni, tak termasuk bonus?? last year ada sia. walaupun, memang berjiwa mulia boss nak kasi cepat, kalau next month lengit seh nak tunggu dia masuk mcm biasa.. tapi kalau setakat gaji as in gaji yg selalu kita dapat, tak yah raya la aku.. nak beli apa sia? potong bill sana sini, habis.. bodo kape? kira tak yah kasi mak bapak duit zakat ah? budak2 tak yah ah? org2 tua tak yah ah? mana nak berkat duit gitu sia? ingat kita gaji ribu kapa? gaji nak bikin gigi pun tak leh.. haiz!!!!!!

dia kata bulan satu baru masuk bonus, ah ye la.. kita sambut gong xi fa cai apa. gi rumah org kasi oren.. wa!!! menyirap sia. sbb nye, baru masuk bonus.. wahai org islam, tak baik tau langgar janji. tak ke bonus yg baru dapat 2 minggu lepas tu, memang dah DIJANJI oleh kamu semua utk beri kita? pada bulan 1 , 3 ,6 & 9 memang tetap ada TERM BONUS!!!! skrg ni, bonus utk raya..lain beb.. SEMUA tempat kerja mesti ada kasi sikit.. ini habuk pun tarak, ada hati nak berbual dgn kita pasal raya. rilek sua.

secondly, apa lagi, missy punya hal la. last week, mama. skrg, ayah.. baik ah.
mementang smlm dia kasi kuih, bagus la dia tu.. missy pandai buit kuih, cantik aje dia buat. ah ye la.. missy baik apa.. mana tau, tu mak dia buat kan. tapi kalau dia buat pun gua tak heran.. alsebagai mana mama selalu cakap, kalau kita nak buat semua, org lain nye tak laku.. so kasi chance ah eh.. gua tak guna apa. ingat gua nak heran kapa? tahun ni, wa cakap ah eh, jgn ingat gua nak nangis ah pagi raya, gua buat mcm hari biasa pun baik..

selamat ah kuih dia kasi, gua tak leh makan.. tak sentuh pun sentuhan tangan dia yg dah pegang taik2 org dan kencing2 org.. yucks!! sugi dia kasi 2 macam. satu dgn kacang satu dgn ceri. dua2 aku benci. lagi satu ntah la.. gua pun malas.. haha!

and yessa, lepas dgn mama, dgn ayah bergaduh.. lepas tu gerenti dgn easmael pulak. raya gua lari pun baik. pergi mana? masuk kubur ah. lagi senang. dok kat sini, menyirap, tambah dosa, menyebabkan hati mak bapak sakit, menyusahkan hidup org, tak guna.. baik dok kubur.

ok.. chill...

sealed with a kiss
12:40 PM

Monday, October 24, 2005

Kini saat yang terakhir

Ku minta maaf kepadamu

Jauh dari lubuk hatiku

Tak pernah ku dendam padamu

Bila engkau tak percaya

Ku rela korban jiwa raga

Kini saat yang penghabisan

Ku harap kau datang kepada ku

Berulang kali ku nyatakan

Aku sayang padamu

Berulang kali ku meminta

Peluklah belailah daku...

Itu tak pernah terjadi

Semua harapan belaka

Nafasku yang terakhir ini

Hanyalah ku tujukan padamu

untukmu yang tersayang.. harapan ku kepada mu, sedarlah akan kesetiaan cinta ku ini terhadap dirimu.

sealed with a kiss
3:00 PM

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Your Career Type: Social

You are helpful, friendly, and trustworthy.
Your talents lie in teaching, nursing, giving information, and solving social problems.

You would make an excellent:

Counselor - Dental Hygienist - Librarian
Nurse - Parole Officer - Personal Trainer
Physical Therapist - Social Worker - Teacher

The worst career options for your are realistic careers, like truck driver or farmer.

What's Your Ideal Career?

nothing better to do so... terjadilah benda ni.. seriously i am damn bored today.. i planned to go out with him today but after my class he called to say he's going jb to have his bike fixed. ok then.. as if i never been rejected before by him.. so, ya.. sat at home doing nothing. then decided to go out to buy my bedsheet for raya. had roti prata telur for buka as mama cooked seafood fried mee. bluek!

and looking at the ideal career, i think that i'm on the right track. hehe... i have always like teaching, i have always like to "counsel" those who come to me with problems. i have been a volunteer doing social work before. and... ya, i am on the right track. hehe..

now waiting for him to be back. ada hati konon tadi dia cakap, nanti lepas abang balik jb kita jumpa k.. ah ye la tu. as if i dunno dia kalau betulkan motor, berjam2 kat sana.. haiz..

besok berbuka dgn family MJ di masai. tapi nampak gaya, aku buka tanpa hamza. dia kerja.. skrg tak habis2 kerja la dek tu. biarlah.. asal kan dia bahagia.

hmm.. kalau tak leh tidoq nanti, ku blog lagi ya.

sealed with a kiss
12:00 PM

Saturday, October 22, 2005

aku suka sekali tiap kali 21st datang.. haiz.. teringat kisah 14 bulan yg lalu.. kisah cinta berputik la kan.. eh, easma kau rilek sua.. haha!! nak feeling2 konon..

okla, this week i am so down.. why?? ntah la.. family sendiri menyakitkan hati aku.. benci sekali kalau org dah start banding2 tau.

actually, my bro, easmael, ada matair ni.. nama faizah.. iza jugak. dia kerja sebagai nurse, so kita sekeluarga ada nama manja utk dia, missy..

aku tak ada rasa tergugat la dgn kehadiran missy ni, perhaps i am so happy that my bro ada matair.. ye la, tak nak la org cakap nanti, adik nye aje yg gatal nak ada matair kan..

but eversince dia "muncul" dlm family ni.. wah wah, aku makin disingkirkan seh.. bukan tak pernah di singkirkan sebelum ni, memang aku jarang menerima kasih sayang mak bapak.. org kata, dah biasa la kan.. tapi this time, melampau tahap maksima punya.

dah 2 bulan la aku rasa jauh ketepi.. haiz, apa la nasib kan.. ye la, aku sedar, aku ni tak cantik mcm missy.. tak slim mcm missy.. tak pandai mcm missy.. tak bergaji besar mcm missy.. semua nye missy angkat la..

mama pun bukan main taksub lagi dgn si missy ni.. ye la, anak kesayangan dia nye matair.. jadi, menantu kesayangan la.. belum apa2 dah nak rival kan aku dgn dia.. rilek sua.. dah kahwin, kalau dia pijak kepala baru padan.

and terjadi la cerita..

mama: iza, tadi aku jalan geylang, ada baju ni, kalau missy pakai memang cantik benar la.. dia kan slim.. lagi tak bertudung, bole la dia pakai yg style2 nye kan..

aku: then? apa hal?

mama: aku nak suro eas beli kan dia.. kalau missy tak cerewet aku yg beli kan..

aku: ah ye la.. belikan la.. mesti dia suka.. ( dgn nada yg penuh ikhlas )

mama: kau jgn jeles.. ye la, kau kan pakai selendang.. jadi susah nak beli baju, pakai aje apa yg ada..

aku: tak ada la nak jeles.. baju iza pun dah berlambak kat dlm almari.. org kat aceh tak dapat nak raya.. ( dah blow sikit ni, tak pasal2 nak sentuh pasal jeles )

so the next few days pun sama, missy tu, missy ni.. missy tu, missy ni..
aahh.. gasak la..

so smlm, terjadi pergaduhan besak antara mama & aku sebelum berbuka..

mama: iza, kau buat kan aku kopi, aku nak tengok. kau tau buat ke tidak..

aku: eh, hello, bab ayak2 ni, hang jgn pikiak cek tak ada mata noh.. ( dgn nada yg selamba, ingat nak bergurau la.. kok tak ketawa.. dia baring dgn muka step dia )

mama: kau pakai gelas ini? memang la kau tak tau buat kerja..

aku: ( dah panas sikit ni ) ma, kan memang selalu iza buat kopi pakai gelas ini..

mama: tak pernah aku ingat.. (cari pasal la tu)

aku: skrg nak minum tak nak? tak nak, iza minum ni.. iza buat kan yg mama SELALU minum..

mama: letak aje la.. kau siap kan buka, aku malas.. sakit badan.. ni tau buat ke tidak ni? nanti ada aje yg tak kene..

aku: nak iza buat tak nak?
( aku pun siap kan lah jugak.. dgn teliti takut kene maki.. lagipun, dah biasa aku buat ni sume..)

mama: ha.. si missy.. bla..bla.. bla.. ( aku pekak kan telinga tak nak dengar )

aku: (dah blow giler ni dgn tenang berkata ) kalau nak sgt, suro missy buat kerja ni sume..

mama: eh, kurang ajar nye anak.. apa missy dah buat kat kau sampai kau bengkak gini?

aku: bengkak apa?

mama: ye la, nak sebut2 nama missy.. dia siapa dgn kau?

aku: ( tiba2 pulak tak leh sebut nama dia.. selama ni apa, tasbih nama dia ke apa?)
ye la, missy pandai pe.. kerja kat spital, senang beli kan mama obat.. iza siapa. hamza siapa. kita ni tak guna..

mama: easmael balik aku bilang dia kau jeles.. hari ni aku tak ada cakap pasal dia pun..

(take note yg dia kata HARI NI.. makna nye dia pun sedar yg dia selama ni, memang berbual pasal dia..)

aku: pagi tadi tak ingat?? gasak la.. nak suro dia pukul iza, pun buat la..
( aku pun menunggu waktu buka )

pagi tadi? sebelum aku kelua kerja, dia cakap,

mama: aku dah belikan missy baju grey utk raya..

aku: bagusla..

utk pengetahuan, this year family aku except aku memakai grey termasuk missy.. mama bersusah payah carikan baju utk dia.. utk aku, sikit haram pun dia tak ada fikir.. so, i'll be the ugly duckling la.. itu yg dia mahu apa..

tau2 aku buka sendiri seh.. baik ah. pasal perempuan tu aku dgn mama bergaduh. that's the best thing yg bole dilakukan di bulan ramadhan..

dan sampai ke hari ni.. aku muram aje.. ye la.. boring seh gini.. kesian budak2. aku tak leh fokus sampai aku marah2 diorg.. sorry eh baby2 teacher..

nasib ada tersayang.. he's there for me.. and depan dia aku pun nangis.. i'm such an emo.. so, mulai hari ni, aku nak rilek.. kalau missy baik, suro dia pasang kan langsir utk raya, tukarkan cadar utk raya, kemas kan rumah utk raya.

dah.. enuff said.

faizah, bakal menantu kesayangan...

easmariza, anak yg terbiar, ugly duckling..

couple yg secocok la wangan nye..

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
apa yg ada pada kita dua...

anyway, utk Syed Hamza, i love you till eternity. thanks for the night!

sealed with a kiss
2:55 PM

Thursday, October 20, 2005

just came back from the majlis iftar with family from my work place.. we break our fast at Sakura International Buffet @ Downtown East. the food? i dunno eh, for those seafood lover, you might love the place, as for me.. it's an ok-ok type of feeling. furthermore i'm eating for free. haha!!

our table is full of food. never in my lifetime i broke fast for nearly an hour +. there's so much food to eat. the sushi spread. hmmm.. got to give a try for those who have big appetite.

suppose we meet today but somehow, he changed his mind last min. fine with me.. so kita dah even eh.. smlm you nak jumpa iza, iza tak leh.. hari ni, i nak jumpa you, you tak nak pulak.. so masing2 dah rasa sakit hati. so, tak yah nak ungkit2 ok.

here are some of the pictures..

me and nana eating sushi..

the ladies who ate with me..

dah kenyang sume.. posing la.. with special appearance by Mdm Hani, Us Ju & Mdm Nor

sealed with a kiss
1:30 PM

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

anybody watched konsert solo featuring Phyne Ballerz juz now?? wow, kenangan lama datang kembali seh.. lepas terawih kat rumah, on tv sekali ada diorg.. the show was recorded 1 year plus ago, but it seems so fresh in my mind..

for those who do not know, i used to be their personal friend.. ya, i'm not lying. lagi2 bulan puasa ni.. they have visited my house before. together with my then kakak angkat we bring them to singapore.

the 1st show diorg pernah buat is at Singapore Expo, kita lah yg manage diorg ni.. kira jaga welfare. makan minum transport sume ditanggung oleh kita. i've followed them to various interviews. kalau ada org nak serbu, aku la usher diorg. haha!! those were the days man..

still remember the 1st time they tried to eat sup tulang kat beach road. makan pakai sudu garfu. takut kotor konon.. beego, beego...

for munir, tak habis mengusik aku.. but i like the way he usik.. pandai.. haha!

for nine, i have more kind of professional talk with him. we talked about politics, architecture, medical sume la.. apa aku merepek time tu pun tak tau la.. yg penting, confident beb..

for billy, memang tak banyak cakap.. abg cool la kira.

as i was typing this, my mind is playing playback on all the things we did together. until some part of time, they need funding to come here.. and somebody offers them a very good rate and ya, they have to follow their new "manager" though that i know, they dislike the mother-daughters collaboration so much.

during the konsert solo, i was not given any privileges to meet them. i still have to join the queue.. imagine, i have to wait in line just to tak picture with them.. hello, i'm their friend ok. i was like being shoved away like that.

luckily the guys backed me up. they saw me and my group of friends and asked me to take picture with them.. aku pun apa lagi, tunjuk kan taring la.. depan2 anak mona J tu tu aku tanya, "ingat lagi tak saya siapa?" beego si hensem tu jawab, "mestila, dah sampai ke rumah tak kan tak ingat.." so sweet.. haha!!

hmm.. tapi tu sume tinggal kenangan aje.. i am no more "bergelumang" dalam dunia artis ni.. i have reached my saturation period. dah tak kisah lagi pasal artis2. sekarang fokus kat ehem2 aje.. hehe...

kalau ada konsert solo Ruffedge, ada jugak cerita best.............

me with beego..

me with billy..

me with munir..

please take note, all these pix were taken BEFORE i went on a relationship with dearest..

sealed with a kiss
1:00 PM

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

finally after so long of waiting.. i get to meet my SAYANG!!!! happy sekali.. kita buka sesama then gi terawih sesama.. best sekali.. thanks sayang..

after terawih biasa lah, masai jugak turun dgn abg ammar & abg mail.. minum air, kutuk mengutuk, aku pun balik..

best ah dapat jumpa dia.. hencem.. tadi sume hensem la berbaju melayu.. hehe..

and ya, found out about my current weight.. wah!! gemuk leh. berat siot. tapi ok jugak la..

anyway, baru habis mandi ni.. nak tido dah.. but wanna call bucuk dulu.. mesti dengar suara dia baru boleh tido beb.. biasa la kan... zaman bercinta.. hahakz!

sealed with a kiss
2:15 PM

Monday, October 17, 2005

i am here just to say that...............

I MISS MY HAMZA SO MUCH!!!!!!!

gosh, help me.. bring me to him.....

sealed with a kiss
12:15 PM

Sunday, October 16, 2005

saturday ke hari ni?? wow!! best nye! pada mula nye i tot best la.. tapi apakan daya, tak dapat kelua dgn yg tersayang.. tido lagi org tu.. balik kerja kul 8 pagi tadi..

jadi utk menyenangkan hati sendiri, aku gi la shopping2 sendiri.. wakaka!! dapat term bonus semalam.. alhamdulillah.

so apa yg aku beli??

ada nampak?? aku beli 5 accessories ni.. teka harga berapa?? ok la, ku bilang ye.. harga nye less than 20 bucks altogether. murah kan??

then jalan2 gi kedai accessories lagi, nak cari utk selendang pulak..

ini pulak utk tudung.. clip kat tepi tu.. hehe.. style baru la. ni sume less than 15 dollars.

then jalan pulak gi watson's, nak beli compact powder. 1st ingat nak beli aje Loreal ideal balance yg harganye $27.90.. tup nak gi counter, nampak pulak compact ZA.. offer lagi best. 2 for $25.50. apa lagi, beli la.. lagi pun dia nye casing lawa.. pink karer..

hmm.. shopping utk make up sume dah settle. selamat sikit.. ah?? make up ini aje?? tak de lah.. ada lagi.. yg last week gi body shop nye sale tu.. ada beli..

ni sume harga dia $77. kalau beli time tak sale, ada la kecut poket aku nak keluakan 100++..

and i went back home, being a one happy girl.. hehe.. jadi anak baik plak tu, tolong mama buat bergedil dgn masak utk buka.. penat seh tangan kepal kentang tu.. mcm therapy gitu..

nak beli baju raya.. tapi tu la, si dia pun mcm dah tak ada masa lagi nak kelua dgn aku.. jadi sabar2 je la.. nak dekat hari raya baru sibuk nak cari. nanti jadi mcm last year, nak cari baju sikit nye susah..

anyway, masuk hari ni dah 6 hari seh tak jumpa dia.. risau semacam aje tak tengok muka dia.. harap2 dia sihat la kan..

sayang, iza rindukan you!!

sealed with a kiss
8:23 AM

Friday, October 14, 2005

utk sekian kali nye, comp ni buat hal. and yes ah, dah selamat di'baptise' haha.. di virgin kan oleh aku. jadi, wahai comp ku tersayang, kau dah selamat menjadi sunti balik, jgn buat hal lagi.. ku bagi karang..

hmm.. smlm risau gelisah seh tak dapat on comp.. tak tido beb.. niari ok ah. tak ada apa nak berbual cuma saje nak update. haha!!

nak buat assignment.. this saturday nak kene submit. and speaking of saturday, kita bakal dapat bonus!!! yeah!! aku nak minta besok ah. harap2 dapat. bole weekend shopping barang2 raya. hehe..

miss my darling.. 4 hari seh tak jumpa. ceh, konon step lama la tu. menyirap aje org lain baca..

utk sis ku tersayang, Alia Delena, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! semoga panjang umur, murah rezeki, and hidup bahagia selalu..
utk family MJ, tak ada buka sesama ke??

and utk yg lain, SELAMAT HARI RAYA!!! oi! dah gile ke?

sealed with a kiss
11:25 AM

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Usah terkejut kalau ada orang melahirkan rasa hatinya pada anda, sedangkan anda merasakan tiada apa-apa istimewanya anda. Begitulah hebat dan misterinya kehidupan. Ukuran manusia tentang kecantikan dan ketampanan memang tidak pernah sama. Ada orang mabuk dengan seseorang sedangkan menurut pandangan orang lain, wajah semacam itu tidak patut dimabuk-mabukkan. Misterinya suara hati memang sukar dibaca.

Tidak ada sebarang alat untuk mengukur makna cantik atau tampan pada seseorang. Ukuran cantik atau tampan ini sentiasa berlainan antara seseorang dengan seorang yang lain. Maka itu, usah hairan jika seseorang wanita dinobatkan sebagai ratu dunia, padahal ramai lagi wanita di pejabat kita yang kita rasakan mengatasi kecantikan ratu itu. Begitu juga, mungkin ada wanita di kampung kita, kita rasakan lebih cantik daripada para model yang popular. Sebab apa? Sebab persepsi kecantikan tidak pernah sama antara manusia.

Ada orang anggap hidung yang sedikit mancung sebagai cantik, ada orang tidak. Ada orang rambut yang mengurai sebagai cantik,ada orang menganggap rambut yang ditutup sebagai kecantikan yang mengatasi. Ada orang menganggap putih melepak itu sebagai cantik ada orang suka yang hitam. Ada orang mentafsirkan kecantikan itu mata yang bundar tetapi ada orang merasakan yang sepet seperti Jepun atau Cina itu yang lebih menawan. Ada orang menganggap bibir yang nipis itu cantik tetapi ada juga orang yang mengatakan bibir tebal lebih mengancam.

Di sebuah kawasan terpencil di utara Thailand, terdapat sekelompok manusia yang

mentafsirkan cantik itu leher yang jinjang. Maka, para wanita memakai besi lilit di leher untuk memanjangkan leher masing-masing. Alangkah seksanya untuk menjadi cantik menurut penilaian masyarakat ini.

Begitu juga di sebuah penempatan di Afrika, cantik ditafsirkan mulut yang lebar. Semakin lebar mulut semakin cantiklah mengikut ukuran kelompok ini. Maka para lelaki dan para wanitanya memakai piring besi berbentuk bulat di mulut. Piring ini ditukar kepada yang lebih besar dari semasa ke semasa. Begitulah misteri dan luasnya makna cantik dan tampan.

Jadi, usah terlalu susah hati jika anda merasakan anda tidak begitu menarik. Anda tetap cantik di mata orang yang mentafsirkan kecantikan itu bukan sekadar wajah tetapi mungkin keseluruhan anda. Ini termasuklah gaya jalan anda, cara nada bertutur, pendirian serta sikap anda terhadap sesuatu perkara.

Jika anda belum mendapat teman, bukan cantik masalahnya, cuma anda belum bertemu dengan orang yang mentafsirkan cantik itu menurut apa-apa kelebihan yang ada pada diri anda. Sebenarnya tiada manusia yang buruk, lantaran setiap daripada kita ini dicipta oleh Tuhan yang Maha Bijaksana. Masakan ciptaan Tuhan itu tidak cantik, malah dalam islam kecantikan bukan terletak pada wajah atau keturunan tetapi apa yang ada di dalam hati. Baik sang hati baiklah seluruh badan, jahat sang hati jahatlah seluruh badan. Agama menilai kecantikan itu iman yang teguh, kukuh dan padu. Siapa kita untuk mempertikaikan ciptaan-ciptaan TUHAN. Sudah tentu kita tidak layak. Tetapi ramai orang mempertikai TUHAN setiap kali menghadap cermin. Berkacalah tatkala bercermin sebab dengan berkaca cermin akan memberitahu anda apakah anda yang berdiri di situ atau perasaan dan keegoan anda yang menampani.

Siapa anda, anda sendiri yang menentukan. Pandangan manusia semuanya tidak sama. Sejuta yang mengatakan anda tidak indah, sepuluh juta mungkin mengatakan yang sebaliknya. Hanya anda belum bertemu muka dengan yang sepuluh juta itu. Itu saja yang membezakan.

sealed with a kiss
12:22 PM

today is the 1st day of him working another job. terasa berat sekali hati ini nak lepaskan dia kerja.. but fikirkan dia, nak tak nak, dia kene kerja dua jugak.. hmm.. harap2 tau la dia jaga diri kan..

setelah berfikir2 kenapa aku dan dia asyik bergaduh selalu, i've come to a conclusion.. that it's just myself. i am the one who is always causing trouble in this relationship. i am too commited to this relationship until i forgets the most important thing, that is called LOVE. i am too afraid to let him go. and he, he has done his part to fulfil my needs. i need him by myside every min every second and he did just that. all the sacrifices he has done for me.. i still remember...

he quits his airport job just because that he's schedule is not to my favour. meaning that he feels that we might meet less if he were to continue working there. the longest period of time that we did not meet selama setahun lebih kita bersama ni is say 3 days aje..

he works at samar cafe only coz he can picked his schedule. i still remember his working hours during my course days last year, he will starts his work @ 11 pm and he will picked me up to work everyday.. isn't he sweet??

and when i thought that when he's serving NS we might not meet each other for a period of time, once more we were saved by the love cupid. he gets to go back home everyday meaning that i can meet him every single day and go out with him every single weekend. how grateful i am..

and now is the only time that he wants to work double and i started to nag.. fikirkan pengorbanan dia selama ni, i really feels he need his own life too. jadi, asalkan dia tau jaga diri, aku tak kisah.. cuma fikirkan penat dia aje.. keluar rumah everyday kul 730 pagi pergi kerja NS, balik kul 645, tunggu buka terus kelua kerja. start kul 8 sampai 2 pagi. dia kene bangun pagi lagi lepas tu.. kesian kan sayang iza tu.. weekdays pulak tu kerja gini.. dunno la...

BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

genap 24 tahun yg lalu, lahirlah seorang bayi yang bernama Anwar Bin Mohamed Yunos. tidak pernah ku dapat lihat wajah abang ku itu.. kerana dia juga mengalami nasib yg sama seperti adik kesayanganku,Dzul.. dia juga pergi menyahut seruan Ilahi.. semoga roh abang dicucuri rahmat.. dapatlah abang dan adik menolong ayah dan mama di akhirat kelak. iza teringin sungguh melihat adik beradik iza penuh berkumpul bersama. ternyata yang Maha Esa lebih menyayangi kamu berdua..berbahagialah kamu berdua di sana..

sealed with a kiss
11:15 AM

Monday, October 10, 2005

and so, he makes up for yesterday event.. and we break fast together today. yippee!! happy sekali!! initially, planning to eat @ pizza hut parkway. but unfortunately, pizza hut is no longer there. so we decided on KFC. suka sekali dengar yg KFC ni putarkan siaran warna, so dapat la kita dengar Azan. thanks KFC!!

and we headed to masjid kassim for prayers. berterawih la kat situ. nak terawih dgn ayah.. ayah buat lagi cepat. haha!! anyway, a good exposure for me.

dah habis, kita pun pergi la ke masai.. saya, hamza, ammar & mail.. hmm.. dok minum air kat situ.. then hantar aku balik.. ada ke diorg kutuk2 sekola2 aku.. jahat eh.. feeewiiit! jgn biol!

penat? bole tahan la.. besok insyaAllah hari pertama berpuasa bersama budak2 kecil tu.. mcm mana la eh?

and for kak alia & abg ismail, selamat ulangtahun pertunangan yg pertama!! in advance la.. hehe..

sealed with a kiss
2:21 PM

Sunday, October 09, 2005

how should i begin.. okay, let's start from here. me thinking of a place for buka together.. asked him to follow me to suntec for the body shop sale. he did sent me there. end up, he break fast at home. how hurt it could be.
and no, it's not a "bye sayang, selamat berbuka" type of bid. instead vroom.. off he go. why? coz of something that i said.

he saw a super 4 bike and sighed on when he gonna get that kind of bike.

i hate him when he sigh.

i hate him when he gives up easily without trying.

i hate him when he said that he's useless.

so i said get your 2a class than we can think of getting one. if you have read my past post in July, i wrote that i would like to save ( and we are saving up together ) to get him a big bike. i am here praying day in day out for him to get what he dreams. but he like to give up easily. and with my words, he felt hurt.

and he pulled long face. i am hurt by his action. and at the same time realised my mistake and apologized. he did not accept it. he sent me home and off he went.

what he don't know is that why i am wanted so so much to break fast with him outside is that,i told mama i would not be home for buka, so mama cooked seafood dishes and nothing but seafood. everybody knows i am allergic to it. and when he's home and told him about it, he could not be bothered. and ya, up till now, i have not touched any food except for A plain biscuit. how much more of hurt must i carry and endure? is it true that love hurts??

anyway, i know he won't bother to know and care if i have eaten or not coz i am sure he will definitely won't be calling me tonight so ya, good night everyone.

sealed with a kiss
1:00 PM

Friday, October 07, 2005

''oh terindah, lagu yg terindah
sengaja aku cipta untukmu yg terindah
semoga dapat meluluhkan segala keraguan
semoga dapat menghancurkan kerasnya batu prasangka

aku takkan melupakanmu
takkan meninggalkanmu
takkan menduakan cintamu, ku bersumpah

aku tak ingin mengingkar janji
tak ingin menjadi duri
tak ingin menjadi api cinta yg membara

rebahlah kau di pelukku
lepaskan resahmu
bebaskan jiwamu dari prasangka-prasangka burukmu
dari kerasnya batu curiga

senyuman melati
sambutlah mentari
raihlah cintamu
hari ini''

this is for you baby.. specially for you...

sealed with a kiss
12:15 PM

Thursday, October 06, 2005

salam to all.. how's it going the 1st day of Ramadhan?? hehe.. for me, i am excused. *sigh* i tot i will be making a hat trick to make it the 3rd year of 30 days of fasting.. but just now in the morning, "it" flows out.. hmmph!!

the family break fast with BBQ chicken from Pizza Hut and Satay. teringat cerita Senario. "time puasa, kita makan mcm raya, waktu raya, kita makan mcm puasa" haha!! but serious, can you believe it, that on the 2nd raya, my mum ada hidangkan lauk celok utk tetamu.. hahah!!! itu yg habis dulu.. ketupat tak ramai yg makan.. weird huh my family??

went to Geylang Serai with mama.. haha! org tak puasa ni dah jalan geylang.. sume kedai kat sana sama aje. same spot, same everything. this year 1st day raya, i am not going to buy a new suit, instead i will sewa aje. hehe.. another weird idea by me.. banyak baju yg tak terpakai jadi this year raya sewa aje la.. bayar 30 dollars dapat jadi glamour. lagi pun 1st day selalu utk ambil2 gambar aje.. jadi grand la jugak. haha!!! cuma nak beli baju sepasang dgn si dia aje.. belum decide on apa colour. lain kali bole fikir...

then on the way balik, turun bedok and jalan kaki balik. step exercise. tgh jalan2, ada la satu family melayu ni tgh duduk kat bench. yg lelaki nye tua jugak la, tanpa segan silu minum air coke and hisap rokok. anak2 dia yg lain pun sama jugak.. kesian aku tengok diorg. tak dapat didikan ugama. tak leh salahkan dari mak ke bapak ke anak dara sampai anak kecil, badan ber-tattoo.. Astaghfirullah!! aku jalan depan diorg mampu ucapkan istighfar dan rasa kesian aje dgn diorg sekeluarga. tup2 passed diorg, si bapak nye cakap " gua tak puasa org atas gua jawab" e eh, aku tak ada komen apa2 pun kok cari gaduh. aku tadi tak puasa jadi apa lagi la, maki hamun dalam hati la.. eee!! geram betul la. idiot!

sedangkan laila yg selalu telefon radio tu tau jugak insaf nak jugak dia puasa. aku yg ajar kan dia niat puasa. harap2 kak laila dapat puasa ok.

masalah aku dan dia, hmm.. memang tak pernah habis.. jadi biar aku aje la yg rasa.. bila dia nak mengerti ni...

as for the lagu, saje nak buat gimik letak lagu raya.. haha!! gambar2 smlm dah di upload, jenguk2 la ye..

sealed with a kiss
11:45 AM

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Wahai sekelian ummat Islam, Selamat menyambut ramadhan al-mubarak. Semoga semua amalan dan ibadah kita diterima oleh Nya..
agak2 dapat tak puasa penuh lagi?? yeah!! lagi 30 hari nak raya.. haha!! puasa belum start seh.

anyway, tadi baru balik dari makan malam bersama puteri2 MJ (hanya puteri2) di Seoul Garden, Tampines Mall.. hmm.. had a wonderful night with them.. here it goes....

alamak, nak tulis tapi malas.. besok aje la k. banyak cerita hari ni.. nak cerita tak tau nak start mana.. how eh? my body is aching all over seh..

gonna have my beauty sleep now. nak tunggu si dia balik dari masai, sampai sahur la aku tunggu.. hehe.. SELAMAT BERSAHUR YE!!

menu utk sahur pagi nanti:

1. Nasi putih ( perkara wajib )
2. Lauk - Sweet & Sour Fish
3. telur mata lembu jgn lupa
4. susu HL ( it's a must )

aku kalau tak ada nasi, telur dgn susu mcm tak sah gitu. i need all the energy beb.

sealed with a kiss
2:45 PM